Newsweek has an
article up on stillbirth, if anyone should find themselves interested. I thought it was good.
I went to the cemetery today for the first time in exactly three months. I had to uncover the gravestone from all the snow and ice. I didn't expect to go there, so I got the job done between my hands and some sticks. We're six months in now. I noticed the other day that I'm having a hard time with crying. I just can't seem to do it anymore. When I think about the twins, that is. Maybe it's acceptance. I try to conjure up new thoughts to get some tears out. I remembered that Evan and I had talked to them, in the belly, right before we went to sleep that night. I don't know if babies that little can be afraid, but we told them not to be. And we told them that we loved them. That worked a little.
We went to this Respect for Life prayer breakfast on Saturday. It's put on annually by the
Pennsylvanians for Human Life, a grassroots pro-life organization. It was nice. Very informative, too. Which wasn't as "nice" as it was staggering. The main speaker heads up a sort of retreat where she counsels mothers who have had abortions. It's called
Rachel's Vineyard. Just hearing about the physical and psychological trauma these women can suffer is enough to make me weep. Please write your representatives about absolutely, definitely not letting this FoCA (Freedom of Choice Act) pass. President Obama's views on this particular subject make me so sick to my stomach. Not so much angry, just really, really sick and sad.
